IDLE BLOGGER » Misc

What happened to all the nice guys?

Jagadish — Wed, 09 Jun 2010 03:16:25 +0000

I see this question posted with some regularity in the personals section, so I thought I’d take a minute to explain things to the ladies out there that haven’t figured it out.

What happened to all the nice guys?

The answer is simple: you did.

See, if you think back, really hard, you might vaguely remember a Platonic guy pal who always seemed to want to spend time with you. He’d tag along with you when you went shopping, stop by your place for a movie when you were lonely but didn’t feel like going out, or even sit there and hold you while you sobbed and told him about how horribly the (other) guy that you were fucking treated you.

At the time, you probably joked with your girlfriends about how he was a little puppy dog, always following you around, trying to do things to get you to pay attention to him. They probably teased you because they thought he had a crush on you. Given that his behavior was, admittedly, a little pathetic, you vehemently denied having any romantic feelings for him, and buttressed your position by claiming that you were “just friends.” Besides, he totally wasn’t your type. I mean, he was a little too short, or too bald, or too fat, or too poor, or didn’t know how to dress himself, or basically be or do any of the things that your tall, good-looking, fit, rich, stylish boyfriend at the time pulled off with such ease.

Eventually, your Platonic buddy drifted away, as your relationship with the boyfriend got more serious and spending time with this other guy was, admittedly, a little weird, if you werent dating him. More time passed, and the boyfriend eventually cheated on you, or became boring, or you realized that the things that attracted you to him weren’t the kinds of things that make for a good, long-term relationship. So, now, you’re single again, and after having tried the bar scene for several months having only encountered players and douche bags, you wonder, “What happened to all the nice guys?”

Well, once again, you did.

You ignored the nice guy. You used him for emotional intimacy without reciprocating, in kind, with physical intimacy. You laughed at his consideration and resented his devotion. You valued the aloof boyfriend more than the attentive “just-a-” friend. Eventually, he took the hint and moved on with his life. He probably came to realize, one day, that women aren’t really attracted to guys who hold doors open; or make dinners just because; or buy you a Christmas gift that you mentioned, in passing, that you really wanted five months ago; or listen when you’re upset; or hold you when you cry. He came to realize that, if he wanted a woman like you, he’d have to act more like the boyfriend that you had. He probably cleaned up his look, started making some money, and generally acted like more of an asshole than he ever wanted to be.

Fact is, now, he’s probably getting laid, and in a way, your ultimate rejection of him is to thank for that. And I’m sorry that it took the complete absence of “nice guys” in your life for you to realize that you missed them and wanted them. Most women will only have a handful of nice guys stumble into their lives, if that.

So, if you’re looking for a nice guy, here’s what you do:

1.) Build a time machine.
2.) Go back a few years and pull your head out of your ass.
3.) Take a look at what’s right in front of you and grab ahold of it.

I suppose the other possibility is that you STILL don’t really want a nice guy, but you feel the social pressure to at least appear to have matured beyond your infantile taste in men. In which case, you might be in luck, because the nice guy you claim to want has, in reality, shed his nice guy mantle and is out there looking to unleash his cynicism and resentment onto someone just like you.

If you were five years younger.

So, please: either stop misrepresenting what you want, or own up to the fact that you’ve fucked yourself over. You’re getting older, after all. It’s time to excise the bullshit and deal with reality. You didn’t want a nice guy then, and he certainly doesn’t fucking want you, now.

Sincerely,

A Recovering Nice Guy

Source: Okay. I did not write this. Obviously, I am stealing this from somewhere. I would link that source but it asks for your twitter password annoyingly and I wouldn’t want people to fall for that. Also it does not link to the original source so I do not feel bad for stealing it. If someone points me to the original source (since I am too lazy to find it now), I will gladly link to it or remove it as per the author’s request. Thanks and hope you enjoyed reading it.

Picture source: Picture is Guy Sensei (or Gai) from Naruto in his nice guy pose.

Protected: Wild Animal Park

Jagadish — Tue, 11 Aug 2009 05:35:32 +0000

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Protected: Sea World

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Protected: Birch Aquarium Album

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Awesome Star Wars Stuff

Jagadish — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 16:57:16 +0000

Just came across this brilliant post on Digg. If you are a Star wars fanatic like I am, then this will surely blow your mind. Here are a few things that I really loved. Check them all out here.

View Photo Album

The mean streak

How to erase permanent marker from your dry erase board?

Jagadish — Fri, 29 May 2009 03:56:58 +0000

Being the idiot that I usually am, I had done something really stupid yesterday morning. I was trying to add a few things to my to-do list on my dry erase board in the office. I mistakenly used a permanent marker on the board instead of a dry erase marker. I asked my girl friend if she had any ideas to erase it and she said its “permanent” and you cant erase it . She suggested that I could use some ethanol to make it lighter. I was even getting ready to ask one of my colleagues to get some ethanol from the chemistry lab. But, before that, I wanted to see what Google had to say about it.

I googled “how to erase permanent marker from dry erase board” and viola I got 122,000 results. I clicked one link that sent me to lifehacker (one of my favorite blogs) and it had a really simple solution (from Wikihow) involving 3 simple steps.

Get a dry erase marker (yes, you make marks to take marks away) and a dry eraser. The darker the color of marker you use, the easier the marks will disappear.
Draw over what you want to erase (make sure you draw slowly to fill it in better).
Erase what you’ve written over as you normally would. Surprise! It erases.

I actually just used a tissue to wipe it off and it all came out clean. Not even a spot or residue. I am completely impressed. This made me realize that I should trust the internet, no matter how stupid the idea is ) .

End of the End Sems..

The mean streak

Jagadish — Wed, 27 May 2009 03:09:17 +0000

So what do you do when you hate someone really bad and you have a chance to ruin them completely, would you do it? or would you just do let it slide?

If you answered yes to the first question, you have mastered the art of being Evil. I sometimes wish I was that brave. There are a few people in this world that I would love to see go down. These people are parasites who basically piggyback ride on other people’s backs. If there is one thing in this world that I really hate, it is the idiots who just have fun all they want and just mooching everything from the hardworking people. I sometimes wish I could do something really bad to them. I feel like a comic book villain plotting something mean and terrible to them.. but I just ending up doing something good for them anyway. I am just nice that way. I wish I could just take a swipe at them and ruin it for good but I just can’t help it. I can never do anything bad to anyone knowingly. I would never be able to live with myself for doing it.

Maybe I am just a sissy who can’t be Evil but seriously for a long time I had a mean streak going on. I could say the nastiest things about someone and not give a damn. It was just pure arrogance and ego and they are both sadly the reason for my downfall. I had it in my head that I am so better than anyone that I found it right to judge others and put them in place. Its amazing how things change so quickly. I have also become a lot softer since I met my girlfriend who helped me put things back on track.

Anyway, this is just a rant. Ignore it .

Major update!!

Kneeling Bench to Prevent Splashing While Peeing

Jagadish — Wed, 13 May 2009 21:48:28 +0000

Honestly, this is the funniest thing I have seen all day. Boing Boing has crazy stuff. Click the link below for a complete description

Kneeling Bench to Prevent Splashing While Peeing – Boing Boing.

The pain of getting mugged

Jagadish — Fri, 08 May 2009 20:27:28 +0000

I was having a quiet evening on Tuesday chatting with my girl friend and I was disturbed by a phone call from my roomate. I was completely annoyed and hoped to God that he wasn’t calling me to open the door because he forgot to take his keys. I know its only a few steps away but I’m just lazy that way . It turns out that the reason behind the call was that one of my friends got mugged at gunpoint. Three black guys came asking for a nickel and just took everything he had on him including his cellphone and wallet, which had his atm card, a few credit cards, his university identity card and several visiting cards he had collected in conferences he attended all these years as a Phd student. They called me to find out the bank phone number so he could de-activate his cards.

The painful thing about being mugged is not just the monetary loss. The few dollars you lose can always be made in a couple of months but the trauma is just unimaginable. This guy was the funniest guy I have known, who was always cheerful and joking about everything in life but he was visibly shaken by this experience. He couldn’t think clearly and we had to make the calls to the respective banks so he could talk to them. It was horrifying to say the least. He had to get a new identity card which cost him $25, a new cell phone and lost a whole bunch of contacts because he took his wallet for granted. He has to get new credit cards and change the card numbers for all his services. Getting robbed is one thing but getting everything back in order after getting robbed is another headache everyone has to put up with.

The weird thing is that, my roomates nearly got mugged two days after this incident. They were walking back home at 230am in the night from a friend’s place. Its just a stupid thing to do, especially after what happened. They were chased by a black guy carrying a gun and they immediately escaped into a nearby apartment complex. They tried knocking on the door but nobody opened and they hid near the stairs until the guy just disappeared. They called one of the guys and he picked them up in his car.

Its just bizzare because Auburn is generally considered to be a quiet place. Its a university town and there have really never been any instances of mugging or anything remotely violent (a few last year but far away from the campus). Even if it happened it was unbeknownst to the desi community living here. This has definitely put me on my toes and this probably means not going out to eat later in the night. Staying away from work late nights and generally looking out in the surroundings. So everyone out there, be careful. Do NOT take your streets for granted. Anything can happen. These are just bad times.

Major update!!

Jagadish — Thu, 16 Apr 2009 05:21:18 +0000

Finally, I upgraded my blog from the stupid free hosting plan of godaddy to the paid plan. No more messy ads on the top. I nearly never see them because of the adblock plus extension installed in my firefox browser. I tried opening the website in Chrome the other day and I was swamped with ads on the top of the site. It was ridiculous. I decided to upgrade my hosting plan and I moved everything to the new host. Fixed all the categories, missing pictures and added tags to the old posts. Took me awhile to find the missing pictures because I was directly linking to the websites (which is very bad because you are stealing their bandwidth) and some of these websites have gone down in the past couple of years.

It took me awhile to find an appropriate theme for the blog too. There was another theme that I really loved but the green really turned me off. I think this is a good temporary theme. I will definitely need to look into theme editing some time in the future. All in good time. A few more fixes by tomorrow:

Fix the blogroll with all my favorite links
Find a newer and better theme for the blog. I love the colors but hate the font and style.
Fix the “about me” page
Add an RSS feed to the sidebar.

Update: I think that basically fixes the laundry list of things to do for now. I will hopefully keep blogging as often as possible.